Jill of Most Trades

I get a daily email from The Generous Wife. It contains "ideas geared to bless your husband (a mix of practical, romantic/sexual and spiritual). [The author suggests you] use the ideas that will work for you and use the rest to spark your imagination in looking for ways to bless your husband."  This morning's suggestion was very timely. Some excerpts:

"I see a disturbing lack of compassion in marriages, and it seems to be getting worse over time.  A total lack of compassion will kill a marriage very quickly, but even a minor lack of compassion will cause significant damage over time.  In fact, having compassion but not enough, or only having it some of the time, is destructive.

Some folks are just lacking in compassion, but much of the time a lack of compassion is a side effect of some other issue.  When we are stressed, tired, worried, hurried or otherwise not at our best it is far more difficult to care, to show compassion.... Figure out the the reason, and then deal with that reason. 

...It's hard to care about others when you are tired and overworked... The solution starts with healthy self care, then moves through to some very hard thinking about priorities and ends in some very hard choices about time use.  We can not do it all.  We must simplify our lives so that we have the time and energy to care about those around us and do the things in life that are really the most important to us.

If you want to be compassionate and caring toward your husband (and others), you have to shape your life so that you have the personal/emotional energy and the time to do so.  It's likely to mean some very tough choices. 

Do not think that love, in order to be genuine, has to be extraordinary.  What we need is to love without getting tired.  Mother Teresa"

Wow. Like I said, Timely. This morning I am wiped out. Yesterday I got up super early (for me) to celebrate a friends birthday over pancakes at Bob Evans and then spent the morning on the garage sale circuit. The whole day was packed (with good things) and ended LATE after a movie-in-the-park with some girlfriends and the kids. Since Joel was gone for the evening at a birthday party, I put the kids in bed, caught up on some emails and then at 12:00 sat down with a fascinating book. Sometime after 1:00 AM I finally pulled myself off the couch and stumbled back to bed. And the result this morning: A groggy momma who can't manage, let alone love or train, her children very effectively. That makes for a grumpy momma who doesn't end up being a very good wife later in the day.

Hmm... "When we are stressed, tired, worried, hurried or otherwise not at our best it is far more difficult to care, to show compassion... The solution starts with healthy self care, then moves through to some very hard thinking about priorities and ends in some very hard choices about time use.  We can not do it all."

For me, this mostly means going to bed EARLIER. Which means giving up some reading or browsing or TV. Those are hard to give up. I suppose those things can be worked in at other times, but
1) if being the wife my husband needs is my first priority after my relationship with God, and
2) that depends on me having the energy to properly manage and train our children (and keep our house in reasonable shape - not my strong point) then
3) I need to prioritize sleep appropriately.

"It's likely to mean some very tough choices." 

Timely.

I really appreciated my friend Sarah's thoughts on Doing without. So I'm thinking more about using what I have instead of just running to the store all the time.

I have been using The Grocery Game off and on for well over a year. There has been some reduction in our overall grocery budget, but I'm not sure how much comes from the TGG savings (on stuff that I *might* not normally buy) or from the fact that TGG provides a list for me to shop from (and you tend to spend less when you have a list). Overall I am trying to be more intentional with our groceries.

The Sentinel has had a good series on cutting your food budget and I have been trying to apply some of their suggestions along with practicing Sarah's challenge to just use what I have in the pantry (always cheaper to use what you have instead of buying something new). Also in an effort to better understand and pay attention to the cost of groceries, I started writing the unit price with a magic marker on a number of groceries (especially the jumbo size things of PB or cheese that I buy at Costco). I want to see if that helps me grasp our food budget better.

I am REALLY looking forward to the opening of our very own local Aldi grocery this fall. Can't wait to see what sort of saving that brings. Might totally reorient my grocery plan!

On a somewhat related note, I read last night that US households contain, on average, 52 unused or unnecessary items worth an average of $3100. That's about $60 per item (not $600 with which my faulty initial read of $31000 equated!) which is no shabby number. I could do a lot with an extra $3100 and would love the extra space that comes with clearing out stuff. Even before I read that statistic, I started posting some of our miscellaneous stuff on our local Craigslist and I'm loving the results!! Since Friday, we've sold a mattress set, 2 bed frames, a trolling motor and a kids train/play table through Craigslist. Love the new space! Love the extra cash!

Of course there are many more thrifty ideas to discuss but I only intended this to be a brain dump of some of the particular ideas bumping around in my brain today. I've been reading a few other sites that have some thrifty tips which you may find helpful:

http://motherhood-moment.blogspot.com/
http://www.debtproofliving.com/
http://www.moneyrulesdebtstinks.com/
http://bargainshopperlady.com/
http://www.thriftymommy.com/

Have fun saving!

In the vein of being faithful with little things... (that actually aren't very little)...

Nothing boosts my faith like seeing (or reading) about others who's faith is tested and they continue to trust the Author and Perfector of our faith. My friend Emily is one such example as her family faces many difficult circumstances through her son Grant's illness. I don't even know how to explain his situation. All I can say is, RUN, DON'T WALK  - metaphorically :) - to their site!!!

I've been thinking a lot about Chinese Believers, especially in light of the upcoming Olympic Games.  Our connect group spent a little time this week learning more about their situation and praying for the Church in China. "The Voice of the Martyrs, in partnership with China Aid Associates, has accepted that call and has produced the Olympic Prayer Band. We would like to invite you to request one to wear during the Olympics. Similar prayer bands will also be distributed to house church Christians in China and they will be praying for you as well." I will be placing an order for these probably with in the week. If you live in the Orlando area and want to wear a band during the Olympics, let me know ASAP so I can order one for you too. This is a very important topic that I would like to write more about soon. In the mean time, here are a few helpful links for more information:

http://www.persecution.com
http://operationworld.org
http://www.hrw.org
http://www.christianpersecution.info
http://www.amnesty.org

Finally, our pastor started a new series last week titled "Bread" about finding our nourishment in the Word. This weeks study guide has focused on John 6:1-15, 25-58 and boy, has it been good. Among other things, Isaac encouraged us to read the passage in several different versions and The Message version really spoke to me. Perhaps I'll write more on it later, but I just wanted to encourage you to check that out.

Well, I'm off to Closing Ceremonies for VBS. My kids have been loving the fun activities and songs that help them learn the truth about Jesus more and more. And the break for me has been wonderful too.

Cora comes around the corner with a somewhat guilty look on her face and a pair of scissors in her hand. My mind instantly recalls the begging from yesterday (and every time "the boys" get their hair cut) that led to me cut her bangs.

Do I even need to go any further with this???

"Mommy, I wasn't cutting my hair, I was...", she trails off.

Hmm, what would be a good alibi??

She did receive discipline for lying to Mommy. But I had a hard time keeping a straight face. She actually did a pretty good job. I know some pretty trendy teens with a similar cut. Not that I'm ready for my baby to be trendy, but it's better than it could have been...